Saturday, June 07, 2014

Lost cat

My cat got lost (is is not home 5 days already ;/) so I told my parents we should go to ask some people around if they seen him. My parents told me: "Noone did, people don't care about cats." and refused to do this (they only asked our nearest neighbor a few days ago - he told us he seen the cat Wednesday morning) so I decided to go alone. I choose an area of rent gardens close to my house because I figured out it is a nice spot for a cat to hunt for mouses so Ipek (my cat) might be there or at least he might come there if he is hungry and there must be a lot of people there because it was very sunny day. 

At first I was scared. I entered the area looking around, feeling like I am not supposed to be there - I am not a resident of those and I was not a quest so I was feeling like encroaching someones territory, uninvited and unwanted.  But I told myself it is something that has to be done and I am the only one who can do this because my stupid parents don't give a damn and it is totally ok to walk there because I am not doing anything back and there is like 20 gardens in the area so walking the track between those doesn't make me look suspicious at all.

I come to the fence of the first garden. An old woman was sitting on a deckchair there. I asked her: "Umm... excuse me. Have you seen a cat? Black-orange, with long fur and very big tail, like a squirrel.". "There is a lot of cats walking here. I have seen a orange one passing by..."  -she answered. "Not orange. Black-orange. Almost all black, just with some orange spots on it's back. And I don't mean today. The cat got lost this Monday and I am trying to figure out where is the territory he used to hunt at so I get a clue where to look for him. Here, its his photo.". Then I showed her a photo of the cat and she said she haven't seen him around but told me to ask other people and look near the area of pond in the middle of gardens. So I did.

I was asking and showing the photo to anyone I seen (however I was not desperate enough to call a man using loud lawnmower, too much noise for me) and I found the pond I had no idea it is there before. There was no cats around though and almost none of those people seen my cat. But the people renting a garden nearest to the pond said they know my cat and seen him many times. Then the owner of the garden told me he seen the cat last Wednesday near the corner shop two streets away. It was some good news. It was 2nd time someone told me he seen the cat last Wednesday in our area. The cat got lost in the Monday so it means he might be alive, just walking around. I was afraid my neighbor was wrong but second person saying the same confirms his words.

I went back to the house and told my mom to go with me to check the shop area. She agreed since she had to do some shopping anyway. Then problems started. I can do it if I am alone but if there is someone with better social skills around I prefer if they do the talking. My mom is a secretary and likes her job, so she should have no problem getting information from strangers. But she wasn't doing anything. She did the shopping and got to pay. I asked her silently: "Will you ask?", she nodded but was doing nothing. I repeated: "Will you?". "Then ask her yourself." - my mom answered. That was unfair. Why was I supposed to do it? I forced her "You ask. You are better with people.". Then she asked and I showed the photo. Unfortunately the shopkeeper said she havent seen the cat since she works here only on weekends.  

We left the shop and walked around a bit. We seen some people in the gardens around houses. I told my mom to ask them but her answer was "They are busy." and when I forced she told me "Then do it if you care that much". Damn it. I come to a woman living close to the shop and asked her. She didn't even look at me or the photo and told me she haven't seen any cat. I got discouraged. I didn't ask anybody else, just went home.

I hope the cat is going to go back. The shop is not that far from my house so if he is really somewhere there he should be able to find the way when he feels like it. So far the weather is nice and I bet there is a lot of mouses around so I guess the cat feels no need to return home just now. Cats can go out for even a few months and then return as if nothing happen, right?

The Exam

Today I had an exam. The national one that gives a prove that I am able to fix computers. 

The exam was in a school in another city - one that I have been inside only 2 times in my life. And I was supposed to apear there at 7:15 in the morning (while the exam was supposed to start at 8AM) which is totally against my biological clock. No surprise I couldn't fall asleep the night before so I ended up sleeping only 5h. In fact it is partly my fault too - at 11PM I reminded I need to prepare clothes for the morning and I should read about something I apperently "had no time" for before (because I decided to play a game instead...). 
So I ended up falling asleep at 1AM (or some time later - the ticking of a clock was really disturbing me, I got oversensitive again) and waking up at 6AM. Not fun at all.

Anyway. I finally wake up and went to the school.My mom gave me a ride there before her work. It looked like I was the 1st of my group but my classmates apeared soon. We started to talk about what we know and what we suppose may be on the exam. A friend of my talked about the thing I was reading about in the middle of night. Everyone was stressed. I was stressed too but I was able to hold the feeling down. I mean. Stress before exam is a normal thing but I was pretty sure I am well prepared. After all I got nearly 90% from the practice exam we had a few weeks ago in the same classroom. "I have to think positive, there is nothing to be scared of, you will do well, if not you - who will?" - I was saying to myself.

The teacher apeared. He told us some data to remember. He apperently seen the questions already but shh, it's a secret. I totally understood what he is speaking about and I instantly wrote the info in my brain storage. Yeah, I got something like that. And I got suprised other people had trouble remembering and understanding the info. It wasn't that hard. It was just 3 numbers: 40, 12 and 2 and a info where and what order to put them in. I quess I was well prepared for the exam after all.

Soon we put our mobile phones and stuff in a seperate room (we were not allowed to have them with us during the exam) and the exam started. I got stressed out. "What now? What if I don't know what do do? What if they consider me cheating while I am not? What if I dodnt know the answers for any question?" and then I told myself "Kate, calm down. Remember what you did right before the end of year exam on the University 2 years ago? Smile.". So I smiled. The stress disapeared. The smile way seem to always work for me. While other people smile when they are happy my smile actually makes me happy and relaxed. I know my brain works a wierd way...

So I looked at the papers. I did all the preparations (writting my number, the ID of my group etc.) and read the questions. First surprise, a good one. "Mount a DVD drive to the computer". Guess what! That was exackly the same thing I got my 90% from on the practice exam I was doing in the classroom a few weeks before! Other people got other questions back then but I wa sthe one and the only one who got to practice with the DVD. Lucky. Second surprise. Not so good one. "Write what type of RAID should make the best use for editing movies? Point adventages and disadventages of it." (I am pretty sure I translated it wrong but it was something like that). I had no clue... I mean - I did know there are at least 4 kinds of RAIDs (0,1,2 and 3) but I totally forgot to read about them and last time I heard about hem on a lesson 2 months ago. And it was a huge question, we were supposed to write an A4 essay about this. Crap. 

"No, you won't!" - I told myself, feeling an panic attack coming "You know enough to pass the exam even if you write nothing about the RAIDs, just do the other stuffs. It's gonna be fine.". And I started to work on the other stuffs. I succesfully mounted the DVD and RAMs I was supposed to, I turned the computer on and I installed Windows. While the OS was installing I read the papers again and answered anything I was able to without entering the system (that included the question the numbers 40, 12, 2 were answer for, teacher was honest). 

Then only thing left was the poor RAID question. "Ok, Kate. You can do it. What was it? Think. What is happening when someone is editing a movie? Yup, the movie is being read and written on a HDD. Can a single HDD do both on the same time?", "No, it cannot.", "Is is possible to read from one HDD and write on another at the same time?", "Yes, it is, there was a RAID doing this.", "Ok. Which RAID could it be?", "Hey, I got this! Most of the RAIDSs write and read on all the drives at the same time but there was one that puts the date once on one drive, then on another and so on. The first one I read about. Was it the RAID 0?", "Correct.", "It was THAT easy? Thanks long term memory!". (It is good to talk with your own thoughts, isn't it? At least you talk with someone smart. :D) Then I thought it out and put some adventages and disadventages as they wanted me to. I got a feeling I got it right. 

What's funny I didn't really understand the RAID thing back then. I didn't see any practical use for this.

Continuating the exam I created user account they wanted me to... I had some problem with that because the question got double meaning and I was not sure which one is correct so I asked one of the teachers watching over us how I am supposed to understand this. She told me something very stupid about that (apperently she had no clue about computers...) so I nodded and when she left I just choosed one of the interpretations that looked slightly more logical to me. Soon after I realised it was the right choice.

Then I got into the system, installed drivers, the printer, created other user accounts, worked out the double meaning thing of the users question, checked the HDD with HD Tune, created the partition using the thing I learned last night at 11PM (lucky me!)... basically I didn't everything they asked me for and I ended up with 1h 15 mins free time (the whole exam was supposed to take 2,5h...). I decided it wouldnt be wise to finish with only half of the exam time passed so I took my time to double check my answers and add some more data that wasnt nessasary but might give me some additional points.

Then I heard one of the teachers asking "Are you done?", I looked around. My friend was preparing to leave. "Yes, as soon as I check this one more time." It was 45 mins of time left. 
"I am done." - I said, getting my stuff The teacher come to my desk, checked if all the stuffs I was supposed to leave are in right order and another teacher walked me to the room we had our mobile phones and stuff. There he asked me how I did. I said I answered every question. "Did you answer the RAID question?", "Yes.", "What did you choose?", "Raid 0, it was the best choice, wasn't it?", "It was. Congratulations. You got this question right.". I left the exam happy. Of course - I probably did some mistakes but the fact I answered all the questions and the question I got most doubts about ended up to be right was very calming. 

Soon after my friend left too. She come to me and we started to talk about the exam. I was quite suprised. She considered some questions hard (noone, maybe except RAID was hard for me) and she was not able to do the partition thing although she was telling us how to do it right before the exam started. She apperently did 3 other stupid mistakes. "You got stressed out, right?" - I asked, wanting a comfirmation. I had no clue why else she could do something so stupid and forget about a thing she was talking so much before the exam. "No, not really.". Was she lying? Before I managed to made up another question another friend of my come out of the classroom. So the 3 of 4 best students were there (the 4th got exam at another hour).

"How did you do?" - I asked and the other friend started to describe. I got surprised again - he also did some stupid mistakes that I could never say he can do.He got same IQ as me! He is very smart! And he is always so calm... Did he get stressed out as the first friend did? (She got lower IQ than we but she spends a lot of time learning so she gets straight A just as we do). I asked. He said no. Were they lying or there was another reason than stress for their mistakes? Or maybe they did no mistakes but were pretending they did so they wont be considered narcistic or something? But whats the point? Why lie you did a mistake if you didnt? It makes no sense. Well. I was not able to ask them for a reason because they started to argue about a question and I decided to explain it to them.

Another 20 minutes passed and 2 more students left the classroom. We asked them if they answered everything. One said "Yes", the other made a stupid face and said "Pff". I quess it was something like "You are joking, right? Of course I didn't.". The discussion continued, I explained the RAID thing to the guys. After a while the exam time was up ad the last student together with the teacher left the classroom. The teacher come to us and said to me "I don't know exackly how many points you got but I seen one minus on your card that the other teacher was checking". "Just one minus?" - I asked, surprised. There was 100 points to get, one minus was getting me at 99 points, it seemed impossible even with the confidence I got. "Well, one minus on the part I have seen.". That was more like it. But still. I don't know how big was the part he seen but even if he seen only the part covering 5 points (which can be checked within a few seconds, but I suppose there is about 25 points on each key page). One minus in those 5 makes me average of 80% correct answers. It looks good so far. Results in August. I can't wait. I got a feeling that if I am not going to pass it then noone will. And the decision who passes and who doesn't is going to depend on the average points of all the students and I would definitelly be above the average.

When I finally left the school something catched my eye on the grass... 4 clover leaf. I haven found a 4 clover leaf like this for ages. I usually find one if I am looking for them out of boredom but never just by passing by. It was apperently really a lucky day for me! 

Wednesday, May 28, 2014

Weekends song.

Last weekend I was in school so I was staying in my grandma house – she lives closer to the school and grandpa wakes up early and can give me a drive by car so I can get to school within 5 minutes. It really makes a difference, especially when the school starts at 7:40 and your biological clock is set to wake up near noon.

Of course I had trouble falling asleep friday night (routine change, different bed and pillow, a lot of unfamiliar sounds - grandma lives near a highway) but this time I didn't care much. I was laying on the bed and looking through the window till about 1 am (my usual bedtime is 2–3am) because there was supposed to be a meteor shower. But I didn't see any, the light pollution was too much and also the event itself was a big fail. Apperently there was only 10/zhr instead of predicted 200–1000.

Surprisingly I have had no trouble waking up. I was already awake when the alarm on my tablet ticked at 6:40 but I decided to lay a little longer – till mobile phone alarm ticks at 6:55 (I set both because I don't trust android devices). It never did. At 6:57 I decided to check the mobile phone and found battery totally drained – not good, it was at 100% at 23:30 when I unplugged it to charge tablet.
So I went to kitchen, plugged mobile phone so it charges a little (it ended up charging to 80% within 30mins, not good) and prepared to school. Grandpa was already awake so he gave me a ride.

School was OK. I got an A from my project although it wasn't perfect at all. I misunderstood the teacher and it ended up that the project I was working over for last 3 weeks to make it perfect isn't what I was supposed to do and I had to present a half way save from the time I was still following the right track. It was also nearly flawless, just lacked some visual improvements I added later. The worst thing is I already got an A from paresenting the half way file 3 weeks ago... I spent 15minutes trying to explain to the teacher that he already seen the file so grading it again is pointless and he should see my finished project instead but he didn't listen to me.

The day was hot. Over 30°C. Even I was able to wear only a sleeveless t-shirt and knee lenght pants. What's more the smell of air and the look of clouds was a clear sign there is a thunderstorm coming in the afternoon or evening.

After school I went to a shop to look for a new battery for my mobile phone (I had to plug it to a USB in school again because the battery got drained very fast) but they didn't have one. Lame shopkeeper even showed me a battery bigger than my mobile phone wondering if it is going to fit. Lol. So lame.

I spent in the shopping center 1,5h but in the end I didn't find anything I would want to buy. They didn't even have my favorite spinach bread and since I was hungry I had to buy a sour cabbage bread instead. When I left the center I got positively surprised. It was still hot but the Sun hidden behind dark clouds and wind started to blow. A thunderstorm was close.

Is started a few minutes after I left the building. Nice wind blows and beautiful lightnings. There was two thunderstorms at the same time – one on north and one on south-west (which happen to be where my house is – too bad I couldn’t be there). I could clearly see some lightning’s but almost all the rain missed me. A light rain started when I was already close to my grandma house but it was all. It ended soon and the street didn’t even get wet – it was so hot the rain was drying as soon as it hit the ground.

There was some more thunderstorms passing during the day but there was no rain and the weather was still hot. Looking at the radars on my tablet I realized there were training storms passing a route from north-east to south-west so they all missed my grandma house from north-west and they all hit my house at full force. At lightning detectors I could see 3 lightning’s hit ground within 1km radius from my house and when my mom called me later I acknowledged there was a lot of rain and some hail there (not like it was a surprise – I seen it on radars hours before she called me) and my garden is literally soaked in the water.    

Once I told my grandma and aunt (which happen to be there – she lives upper floor in the same building as grandma) there won’t be any more rain (I could see the track on my radar) my aunt decided to invite some quests and make a garden party. I stayed inside the house (the thunderstorms got weaker and went a little more north-west so they were not so fun to watch anymore) and tried to fix my mobile phone. I uninstalled all the apps, set settings to default and while checking if the battery fixed somehow I started to look for a mobile phone wallpaper using my tablet. Then I realized the tablet is draining battery fast too. Not as fast as mobile phone but it was still 1% every a few mins. And it was getting hot fast.

I got a panic attack. I started to check mobile phone and tablet constantly and everytime battery of any of them dropped my emotions were getting worse. I realized my mobile phone is very hot too and well – dropping 30% within 20 minutes despise of no apps installed wasn’t normal at all! I could stand if it was only mobile phone – I am thinking about buying a new one anyway. But tablet is a new thing (8 months old) and the battery is builded in so I wouldn’t be able to change it if it was broken and the tablet is a thing I am somehow addicted to because I use it to watch anime and read manga for a few hours everyday!  

Then my aunt came to bring me some barbeque meat. I got angry that she is disturbing me when I am busy thinking about the batteries problem. I made an angry sound similar to a dogs grown and yelled at her “You are disturbing me”. Then my uncle came and told me to join them. I told him I am busy but he told me to get a break from the electronic stuffs. I told him there is a problem with them and I just can’t let it go but then I realized I am not alone –There was at least 8 people there,  at least 4 of them had android devices and at least one (my uncle) knew a lot about android. They might help.

So I took my phone and come to them, describing what the matter is. As I supposed they told me I might have too many apps installed but I told them I uninstalled everything I could. Then they told me I have to uninstall more but I knew it isn’t the deal – I basically got only 1 app running and I always use it. Then they told me to let it go and tried to stop me from looking at the phone battery status all the time. I couldn’t help it. I was doing it all the time till the battery temperature dropped under 30°C and suddenly the battery status got stable. Apparently the high temperature was the cause.

Then I started to listen what the people are talking about. Aunt and her friends were walking around the garden checking plants, my cousins disappeared somewhere and uncles were arguing about politics, they wondered who to vote for, one of them was wondering about Janusz Korwin-Mikke party and the others were telling him the politican is a crazy guy. My information in this field was not up to date so I brought my tablet (it also stopped to drain battery once temperature went down) and started to read info about the parties staring in the incoming elections (apparently elections were the next day, and I decided I want to vote).

I lost track of time and awareness what is going on around me. I was busy reading. Then my uncle asked me: “Got anything interesting there?”. I gathered enough knowledge so I asked him: “Are you still talking about politics” and once he said “Yes” I started to tell about what I just learned. Then I looked at the guy wanting to vote for J.K-M and told him there is a new party with similar pillars but not so crazy leader and it might be a better choice because I agree J.K-M isn’t someone wise to choose (for people interested: some assume J.K-M got undiagnosed Asperger – he is rigid, he can’t act correctly in social situations, he tends to monologue about his topics of interests and he got uncommon tone voice and way of speaking, not a good politician material). Then I described the party ideas. They asked me a name and I said that it is right, the guy is in the party. All of them agreed the party I was speaking about – Polska Razem – seem like a good idea if someone wants a party with similar status but without J.K-M leader.

Then they started to talk about something else and I got on some forums, killing time and getting unaware of my surroundings again. After a while I realized it is getting cold – so come to the house, got my sweater, a jacket and put on 2 pairs of socks because 1 was not enough and returned. I looked at the people. Everyone was sitting around the table, eating, smiling, talking. A few people had some sweaters on but half of them was still wearing t-shirts and shorts. C’mon... Weren’t they cold?

I sat on my spot again but put my tablet next to me instead of browsing the net. I decided to listen what they speak about. I can’t remember. There was 2 or 3 conversations at the same time. I couldn’t focus on just one. But then a sound come and right above us appeared a low plane. “What’s going on? Why is it flying so low?” – someone asked and I answered instantly “It is going to land in Kraków. Today there was a change of wind – thunderstorms were moving east to west instead usual west to east so the planes are going to land opposite of the way they usually do since they always land and start opposite of the wind. I am will check for more info.” then I got my tablet again and checked flightradar to see what the plane is. It was from Edinburgh to Kraków. I was right... and I got focused on an interest too much again. Fortunately they catched the topic and asked me about the application that I used and I was more than happy to answer.

It was getting dark. I looked at the sky – there were still clouds but I got a feeling they will soon disappear, the starts will show up and the night sky will be visible better than yesterday due to less air humidity. I was supposed to go to sleep early (next day I had to wake up at 6:40 again) but how could I resist the possibility to spend a few hours under the black sky? Even in a place where light pollution is big? I decided to stay much longer.

Soon my cousins come. One of them brought his electric guitar. I got scared it is going to scare me off so I told him “I beg you, just don’t set it too loud” but surprisingly I was able to stand the sound. I guess my sensory issues decided to stay on leash today (maybe it was because it was so dark around?). My cousin started to play, he did it surprisingly well – he is only 14 year old and he could play the beginnings of a few songs. Everyone started to tell him what he should play, got their android phones out and started to play their own music arguing which one he should learn and giving him advises. I really admired he is able to stand it and not lose his confidence. He was trying almost everything and showing what he already can play. I had problems recognizing the songs by the sound so I asked him for the titles and found the lyrics on my tablet. It ended up I know the songs.

I started to sing. They looked at me surprised. “You can sing?”, “You got a great voice!”, “Why won’t you go to the Idol?”, “How possible you know all the words?” – they started to say. I was not sure if they are being sarcastic or not but I didn’t care. Singing was fun and I finally found a way to spend the evening without worrying what they are speaking about. Every time they told my cousin to play a song I was checking the song on youtube and singing. I only needed a few first words to be able to sing the whole song. Soon my cousin stopped to play and they started to tell me what song I should play on my tablet. I was singing along with the vocalists. On some songs other people joined me but they were missing some words. And I could sing clearly almost every song I ever listened. Despite of the fact I am not interested into music and all I listen is the radio and songs my mom plays at home and I listen to them only because I have no choice – my mom loves music and won’t let me turn it off... They asked me how I am doing it and I said I can hear the song with a second long advance in my head so I hear the words and voice melody in my mind before the vocalist sings them so I can sing with him, keeping the melody. They told me I am savant. I told them it is just my photographic memory.

I was singing like that for about 2 hours. Then midnight came and I decided it is time for me to go to bed. I said goodbye (they seemed unhappy I am leaving because they apparently had a lot of fun with me and my tablet), took a shower and went to bed. I left the window open to look at the dark sky (the stars appeared, I was right about the visibility) and I could hear them talking in the garden so I couldn’t sleep. But for some reason I didn’t care. I was happy and fell full of energy. Weird.

I fall asleep about 2AM when they finally decided to stop and I wake up at 6:08, 30 mins before the alarm clocks. There was a lot of sun in the room (it heads east, the room in my house heads south so I am not used to so much sun in the morning, sun appears in my room about 11AM) so I got scared I overslept. But I didn’t. I laid down again but I didn’t fall asleep anymore. I wasn’t sleepy. I was full of energy and only my “sandy” eyes were a sign I slept only 4h. I closed my eyes and reminded my dream – I was attending a judo lesson with my cousin and I beat him up. A clear relation to yesterday’s playing and singing.

Then when the right time come I got up, put my clothes on and went to wake up my dad which didn’t wake up yet which was surprising because he usually wakes up by that time. I looked at him and a stupid though come to my mind – he was not moving and his eyes were closed, what if he was dead? Then I seen him breathing. I touched his hand, he didn’t wake up. I told him “Grandpa” and my own voice surprised me – it was great, beautiful. I had no idea I can use such sweet tone of voice. “Grandpa” I repeated using the same voice and grandpa moved but didn’t wake up. “Grandpa, wake up.” – I said, still same voice. Grandpa opened his eyes and smiled. Even I could see it is a honest, surprised smile and he isn’t angry with me at all even though he usually doesn’t like when someone wakes him up.

When Later at the day I returned to home I overheard my grandma talking to aunt. She said she heard me waking up the grandma and she described my voice as “a little angel”. And it looked like grandpa was very happy the whole day. But maybe it was the weather or something? I was in a perfect mood too. Or maybe it was all because I was in a great mood and my mood made him happy too? I don’t know.

Anyway. It was a very nice weekend. 

Saturday, May 10, 2014

A wasp.

Sunny saturday. My parents decided to make a garden party with a fireplace and baked potatoes.  They invited two of their friends – a man and a woman about their age. At first I didn’t even realize they are there – they entered the garden through back gate and I was staying in my room (front of the house), surfing the net as usual. I realized when my dad and his friend come to the kitchen to get the food. They were talking loudly and I was wondering when my dad is going to tell me I should go and say “Hello” to the quests.  He always do it and is angry with me that I won’t think about doing it myself. I can’t see a point – it’s not like I invited, like or find their friends funny/interesting.

Surprisingly this time he didn’t say anything to me so I was allowed to stay at my computer, pretending I’m not home. Sometime later my mom come home for some dishes and yelled:

Kate!  Will you eat the potatoes?
Maybe... – I bought some time for my mind to remind what she is talking about: potatoes, they are doing a garden party with a fireplace, so they do the baked potatoes, I like baked potatoes as long as they are from the bottom of the pot = a little burned. So I specified:  - I will. 
- They will be ready in 30 mins.
- Ok.

Then she left the house and I returned to surfing the net. No more than 7 mins passed mom entered the house again and yelled:
- Potatoes are ready! Come! 
- ... pff. You said they will be ready in 30 mins. It was only 7 mins since then! – I said, fighting with the feelings of the sudden change and the necessity of instantly finish what I was doing. I don’t like it. I was not ready to go.
So I was wrong. Deal with it. Come before they get cold.  

Well, it couldn’t be helped. I checked the website I was reading – nothing too interesting, just some news. I was just killing time knowing I can’t start anything too absorbing since once I get focused on something I stay like it at least an hour. So I turned off the screen, get my jacket and shoes on and went to the garden.

Oh, look. She is also cold! -  the woman friend said once seen me.

I looked at her, she was wearing a pullover. Not much - compared to my t-shirt, a warm sweater and the jacked I got on. But something if you compare it with only t-shirt of my mom or the light blouses of my dad and the other man.

Good afternoon. – I said, looking for a chair.

There was 6 chairs but all were faced to the house, I wanted to see the fireplace. So I took a chair and moved it to the other side the of table and sat on it.

My dad brought the potatoes pot. My mon started to put them on the dishes. Suddenly she said:

- Damn. I put too much on Kate’s dish...  

I looked at the dish, surprised. She just started to put the potatoes so and the burned ones are usually at the bottom so why was it my dish already? It was only 2nd one! Plus - there was a good amount of potatoes but half of the dish was sausage and carrot slices which I hate.

- Why is it my?
- Because I put it for you.
- Give the dish to someone else.
- No, it is yours.
- This is too much.
- Nothing will happen if you eat it.
- At least take out the sausage and carrot slices.
- Why?! They are good.
- I dislike them!
- At least try, they are really good.
- No. Take them out. I hate sausage and cooked carrots taste!
- Stubborn as a mule... 

She removed most of the sausage and carrot and gave me the dish. I put it on the table waiting – not sure if I am supposed to eat it already.  The quest woman was next. She started to eat instantly so then I started to eat too. Then my mom said:

There are some burned ones on the bottom. Who wants? 

I moved my dish to her.

Oh, that’s right. Kate likes them. <puts burned potatoes on my dish> Someone else?

In the end everyone got some. I finished eating first - leaving all the sausage and carrot on the dish.

Wow, she seriously ate a lot. – the woman said, looking at my dish.
It wasn’t that much. – I answered (without the sausage and carrot it really wasn’t)
Oh. That’s true. Kate and my husband can eat a lot. <me: looking at her, suprised> They are slender and you couldn’t say it but they eat a lot and they eat in the evenings and even at night!
I don’t eat as much as dad! I eat often but I can’t eat too much at once or my stomach hurts.
- But you eat in the evening. – my mom repeated.
Like after 6pm? – the woman asked.
6pm is not evening. – I said.
Oh, I forgot. You like staying long at night. For you evenings starts at like 11pm?
- That could be right.
- Oho. –  the man said suddenly  – Wieslaw(dads name), you got a job to do!
What’s going on?
- Look up. There is a wasp hive. It’s small but in a few days it is going to be thaaat big. <showing it with his hands>

Everyone looked up. That was true. High under the roof of our garden house, right above the table there was a ball like, gray thing about 4cm size with a small hole. I started to look at it and couldn’t look anywhere else. I was preparing to escape.

Yeah, right. – my dad said, laughing.

I got surprised. Why did my dad laugh? It was a serious thing! It was dangerous. It was a damn wasp! They are aggressive. They sting!

Wieslaw, no. It’s real. – my mom said.
You are making fun of me. He definitelly bought it in a shop and put it there to see my reaction.

I started to wonder. Could it be they really make fun of my dad and I am a side victim of this joke? But how could it be? It wasn’t something to joke about...

I am sure you are joking. <dad bringing a long stick> I’m going to throw it from there.
Are you crazy!? – I said, jumping off my chair – It’s definitely real! The wasp is  gonna jump off and sting us when you do it!
Yeah, Wieslaw. Why would I lie about it? How could I put it there anyway? – the man said.
Well. If it is true I will just come here at night and take care of it. – dad finally said and sat down.

I sat back, fascinated by the hive. I was scared but I couldn’t force myself to get away. Then a wasp come out. It started to fly around the table. It came near my face. I escaped, stopped right outside the garden house and looked back. They laughed at me. But I didn’t care. For me I did the right thing and they were the ones crazy since they stayed there. I might be afraid of wasps but I also understand how to be save around one. It’s not a phobia in my case, it is being careful. A wasp usually wont attack you unless you piss her off for some reason or it considers you a danger. We were sitting way too close to the beehive. She could attack any moment, trying to protect the hive.

Get out everyone. – I said, scared – It might sting, we are too close to the hive.

Then the wasp come close to my mom face. She jumped off the garden house. Others followed her, slowly. We were watching the hive from outside for a while. The male quest got near me and poked my back at a moment. I hit him without realising what I am doing. He scared me! Fortunatelly he didn't seem to care.
Soon the wasp entered the hive and stayed there.

Kate, go to check on the Internet how to get rid of wasps. – my mom commended.
You know? I think will really do it. – I answered, using wierd tone of voice.

For some reason the voice of my mom sounded like sarcasm to me so I decided to use my sarcasm answer mechanism (a change of voice that is supposed to say “I don’t care what you think about me”) but it made no sense since it was dangerous situation and checking the methods was a logical solution. Perhaps I mistook the fear in her voice for a joke voice.

I turned the computer screen on and checked how to get rid of a wasp hive. There were some methods. All of them were “to do at night, with a lot of clothes on”. Some included putting soap water to the hive so the wasps can’t fly, some advised to close the hive in a bag and drown it, some to throw the hive into a hot water pot and some to set the hive with fire (but some wasps might escape when feeling the smoke). I also learned that the hive we got there is a small hive of a young queen and it is probably the only wasp around since she didn’t rise the workers or protectors yet (but there is a chance a few others queens help her).  If we manage to kill the queen the hive won’t be builded again. If the queen survives we will have to try other methods – like hanging a brown bag so the wasp thinks there is other hive in this place.  It took me 10 mins to learn.

With the knowledge I come back to the garden. They were sitting around the table again. The hive was still there. I started explaining. I said about the night and clothes, about the water and fire... Then the male quest come to the fireplace, lighted a stick and put it in front of the hive enterace so the smoke gets there. I tried to say it is a bad idea but it was too late. The wasp got out and escaped. Then he burned the hive.

You shouldn’t do that. Now she is going to return and build the hive again. – I said.
Is there any way to prevent it? – my mom asked.
The sure way is killing the queen, that  escaped. But we might try hanging a brown bag near so she thinks it is another hive.
Like the ones bread sells in?
- I quess it will do.

My mom went to the house and brought a brown, paper bag and the male quest put it under the roof using a stick. Soon the wasp returned. It started to fly around the bag. They started to say:

She isn’t giving a damn.
- She is wondering what it is.
- She is going to live inside it! You brought her a new home! 
- No. – I said, watching how the wasp behaves, it was pointing the bottom of her body towards the bag. - It is ready to attack whatever comes out of the bag.  

The male quest attacked the wasp using a flaming stick again, the wasp escaped but returned soon. Then it started to levitate in the air near my cats face white the cat watched it, ready to attack.

- Filip! No! – I said, scared and without much thinking started to clap my hands loudly closing them to my cat face. To scare the cat so it won’t attack and get sting. The cat got distracted.

Then I realized what I am doing. Damn it! I am clapping hands right next to the wasp!!!  I am stupid or what!?! It’s going to think I am attacking it and sting me! I escaped a few meters, looking around if the wasp isn’t following me. But no, it was nowhere to be seen again.

After a while the quests said “Goodbye” and me and my parents returned to the house. After a few minutes my mom said she is going back to go to the garden. I was pretty sure she is going to try to hunt for the wasp and she will definitely get sting. But I said nothing. I decided it is probably just my anxiety and she isn’t a child so she can watch for herself.

After a hour or so the garden door opened and my mom yelled:

The damn wasp stinged me in neck! – and then she run into bathroom, to see the mirror – Where is the sting? We have to take it out! I can’t see the sting!
Wasps don’t leave a sting. – I said calmly, getting inside the bathroom to see how bad it is. I was scared but stayed completely calm. It wasn’t time for emotions. It was time to act wisely. I looked at the sting area, a 10cms of skin was red and there were 2 white bubbles in the middle of it. Fortunately it didn’t look like an anaphylactic shock. – I have known it is going to end this way. 
What do you do after a wasp stings you?! – mom asked.
I’m going to check it. Just a moment. – I run to my room to check the internet fast.

I guess the adrenaline rush helped me keep my mind focused since I didn’t get distracted by my dad’s panic attack – he was yelling “Damn it, Damn it! Damn it!” and couldn’t stop. My mom yelled back to him “Calm down! In the worst case I will die! No need to panic.” I have no idea how was supposed to help, in my opinion it was getting it even worse but whatever. Within 30 secs I found that if there is no sign for anaphylactic shock you need to clean the area with water with vinegar and put a cube of ice surrounded with a clean tissue. So I said it to my mom and she did it.

And then both me and father gave her a lecture that she shouldn’t act so incautiously and “jump” so much since it might kill her one day (It’s my garden! No damn wasp is going to rule in it! I won’t let it! – she was answering).  A hour later everything got back to normal. Right now her skin around the sting area is only a little red.

Thursday, May 08, 2014

A big city cinema date trip.

I "almost have a boyfriend" (I still don't know how I feel about him). We were dating in my surroundings all the time so I decided I should go somewhere closer to the city he lives in at least once. I was holding back for long, about 2 months (well, he counted the time, not me...) but last week I finally agreed we should go on a date in Katowice (a big Polish city about 40km from my house) to see a movie in a cinema in incoming Sunday. Just thinking about it was making me anxious so I only checked the time a bus comes from the bus stop and what stop it stops in the city so I can get there and told the guy to prepare the rest of plan. Then I prevented myself from thinking about it. I just put in my head to "Sunday you get inside a bus at 13:30 and come back home using the bus at 19:30 or 20:10" and buried all worries so "I will deal with it when it happen, no need to worry in advance". It wasn't a nice strategy but there was just too much unknown to plan  everything so I had to prepare myself to "expect unexpectable". 

Anyway, finally the Sunday come and I got to the bus stop. It was 13:28, bus was not there yet. I started to worry maybe I got too late (I even checked the bus plan to make sure the bus really starts at the 13:30). Bus come two mins later. I successfully entered it and took the best sit - near the driver so I could see the road. Bus moved. It was 13:32. Suddenly I got anxious - I realized I didn't check the bus designation - I entered it just because it looked like it should and it come on time but what if 2 exactly alike buses were supposed to start about the same time from the same stop? Fortunately soon I calmed myself. It was stupid. After all I checked the buses plan no longer than 4 mins ago and I could say there is no other bus starting at this hour (photographic memory). So there we go. I texted the boy: "I am in the bus, I will be there as planned." and tried to have fun with the trip or at least stay calm so he won't see a shutdown when I get out of the bus in a hour :D . 

It wasn't easy. The bus was loud itself and there was also a loud music in it. What's worse one of the passengers decided to talk through his phone the whole time. Very distracting. Once he got out in a few stops I actually could hear how SILENT it become even though the car and radio were still way to loud for my taste. I was happy with my sit for a long time - I could focus on the road imagining I am driving my own car with no people around. I was also telling myself that if something is gonna happen to the bus (an accident) I will see it fast enough to react. But soon the bus started to become crowded and there were people staying above me. And every passenger coming and leaving was passing my spot. Not fun at all. Most of the people were pissing me off but once I got quite interested. Not with someone but with someones jacket. The material looked like a perfect stim toy for me, I had to use a lot of my will not to touch it. 

Ok. So after a hour I finally get to the city. I got out of the bus. The boy was already waiting for me. I gave him a hug and he started a conversation. The sense of what he said was getting to me with a delay but nce I realised he said the bus was late I started to wonder out loud how they make the plan since the car was moving quite fast and there was no traffic - I couldn't imagine how the bus would be on time on a regular day. I was focusing at nothing but my words. Call it a well holded shutdown. All my senses were temporary out and all signals were going to me with a delay but I could speak and it made sense. Not bad at all. 

After a few mins I got back to myself and realized I have no idea where I am and how I got there. I didn't even have a clue where the bus stop is. I could only hope the guy knows where we are going and won't leave me like this. I was definitely lost. Fortunately soon I started to realize the surroundings - after all I checked the google maps looking for the bus stop so ... well, call it my photographic memory again. Anyway. I wasn't so lost anymore. 

The guy showed me some places. I wasn't really interested or even recording too much but it was a nice walk. I focused on telling him about the trips I was at back in high school and how we were lost and I found the way. You could call it a show off but soon we turned a wrong way and the boy said we need to return to the main street because we were supposed to turn next street and I asked him "Why? This way we also can get there, this way is just parallel to the main street." and then successfully leaded him event though it was my 1st time there. Then we ended up on the street he wanted us to get to. Photographic memory. 

Then we got to the cinema. Well, not really. We got near the building where the cinema - and a whole shopping center was. He told me we have to make a round around the building to get to the cinema but I told him there must be an enterace to the cinema through the shopping center. So we entered it. A lot of people, a lot of stuffs, a lot of sounds - sensory overload. But ok, no problem. I was focused - "I must find the cinema" so I was able to hold the sensory issues on leash, at least for the time. I went straight to the spot where I supposed the cinema is.I was never there but if the boy was sure we have to pass the whole building then it must have been the right choice. We got at the end of the store. Used the moving stairs, 1st floor, 2nd floor, 3rd floor. "Hmm... I can't see the cinema anywhere" - the boy said, looking around. "There." - I answered showing him the stairs to 4th floor. So I was right. The cinema was there. 

We went for the tickets. The ticket price 24PLN, I gave him 30PLN to pay for me, he did. He had a trouble thinking how much he is supposed to give me back - he ended up with 2PLN+5PLN coins in hand (he apparently prepared 25PLN for his ticket, paid 50PLN and got 2PLN back). So I looked in my wallet, got a 1PLN, gave it to him and took the 7PLN, honestly, 25-24=1, 30-24=6, 7-6=1. Is math that hard? 

We had 30 mins till the movie so we decided to check the shops. But first I had to go to the restroom. Finding it wasn't so hard - the icons were not too intuitive for me and the restroom was hidden deep in a corridor but it was fine enough - but getting to know what to do there was harder. :D I enter the sinks-room... so LIGHT! My poor eyes. Well. Whatever. Gotta pee, no need to worry about too much light in a room. Another problem - 3 doors (4 including the ones I got in through), all the same, all closed, no icons on them. I'm stuck, no idea what to do. What if I end up in a service only room or something? Before I decided which doors to try 2 girls passed me and went straight to the doors on the other side of the room - so it had to be the right choice. Honestly, they should have a icon. I entered the restroom. 14 colorful doors, all closed, with locks. Which one to choose? Oh, right. I know the trick. The taken ones should have a red dot on the lock! Ok, got one. <opening>. Uff, I was right, there is noone behind those. Here we go. Enter, lock, check lock, check lock again, put some toilet paper on the desk, pee, stand up... <the toiled pushed the water itself> Stupid toiled, it stace the hell out of me. There is a camera or something? Preverts... Nah, it can't be it,there must be just a detector. Whatever, not like I care. Open lock, open... door? WTF? The door won't open! Ok... calm down, calm down. Think, what might be wrong? The lock is open, right? How about the handle? It's round, the doors should be push and go... Hmm, maybe not. <spins, door open> Ok. So it was the trick. 
Now the sinks. <entering the bright sinks-room again>. Ok, here is the soap. Does it gets out itself or do I have to push like I do with the soap in my home? <pushes, soap gets out> Hmm, what a surprise, usually they require some weird tricks. Ok. Now the water. Do I push it too? Lets hope so. <pushes, nothing happens, looks closely, see a handle> So perhaps it is the trick? <spins the handle, nothing happens> Oops, not it either... Anyway, what did I just do? I didn't broke anything, right? And noone seen me? ... Well, perhaps it is one of those pacs. <pac the tap, nothing happens>. Nah. So it has to be the close up, where is the detector? <sees a darker dot on the tap, closes hand to it, the water runs>. Ok. So it was the trick. Man,  there should really be a tutorial or something. Now I have to dry my hands. <looking around for a towel, sees only a hot air dryer> Yeah, the hell like I am using this scary machine <takes out a tissue of her backpack and uses it as a towel>. Ok, free to go. I honestly hate restrooms like that. <looks around, see 4 identical doors>... Crap, where was the exit again? <someone enters> Ok. Here it is. Kate, focus, this is the door you entered here. Remember? 

So I am outside. I said sorry to the boy that it took me so long (and explained I almost got lost in there xD) and we took a walk around the centre. I was looking for some food but there was literally nothing I knew. There was some weird and expensive food and there was no regular shop, just coffees and a candy shop with candies I never eat before. After a while I told the boy I give up and I will just eat some of the food I got in my backpack so we just should go to the cinema floor. We got only 10 mins left so we could as well go to the room already. When going on the moving stairs again I got anxious for a while since the stairs were making a funny shop. "The stairs are going to break soon, can you hear the cracking sound" I laughed to hide my fear. 

We got there. "We have to go to room 5, I can see rooms 6,7,8,9 but not 5" - the boy said. "The room is right there" - I answered without looking much around, I could clearly see the number 5 on one of walls. "But the way seem to be closed" - I continued <looking around> - "Ok, we have to go this way, I can see a passage to the other side on the way to rooms 6,7,8,9. And there is a guy standing there, probably he is the one checking tickets, but he looks more like a security service". So we went there, we showed the tickets and the guy told us where to go. It was exactly the way I figured out. So I lead us to the room (btw, its funny how I figure out everything most of the time but how I can feel lost in a stupid restroom). 

We went there, we sat (I was the first who figured out where ore sits are), I ate some cake I brought with me (then I relized maybe I should give him some - but hell, I was hungry and the cake was small xD) and the movie (or rather ads, 25 mins of ads -_-) started. Soon I realized the screen is too big and too bright and the sound is way too loud. The sits also were not too comfortable. And it was quite cold there. Sensory issues finally started to piss me off, huh? Oh, well, it had to end this way. I have to deal with it, its not like I go to the service and tell to make the screen darker, keep the sound down and turn on a heater, right? :D Also - the boy decided to try something and put his arm at my shoulder (at least he asked first and I agreed so point for him) - but it wasn't comfortable for me (his arm was too heavy) and certainly for him neither because he gave up before I suggested. I wonder if the sensory issues was too much or I just don't like his touch. 

The movie was nice ("Divergent") and I had fun watching it but I have to say the quality wasn't good at all. I bet they prepared the movie for 3D but we were watching it 2D. There were definitely some cues usual for 3D - many close ups, stuff disappearing at the end of screen and what's important - small depth of focus. For someone who usually see "too much" the strong but focused on just one thing visual stimulation wasn't too comfortable. I was keep trying to see what is in the fog behind the characters. This, plus the screen bright and the loud sound got me a terrific headache. 

After the movie finished I dreamed of nothing but to "Get the hell out of there". I walked out of the cinema fast and almost run through the shopping center. "Finally, fresh air!" - I said, wondering what now. I could say another shutdown is coming. The boy lead me to a busy street, I had no idea where we are and where we are going again. My head hurt badly, I was overstimulated, I wanted to go home, and I was... hungry - that I realized seeing a McDonald sign. "You know what I feel like I want? A cheeseburger!" - I said and we turned to the "restaurant". I ordered a cheeseburger, he got himself a salad (huh? Well... the boy definitely isn't like all the man I know), we got out, we ate it at fresh air. My head stoped hurting, for that time being. 

Then we went to a park and I said my first bus will come soon so we should head to the bus stop. He lead. We got lost. "Umm... it supposed to be somewhere here... but we are on the other side!" - he said. I turned around, I had no idea where we are but I was sure I can figure it out. I saw a half covered building with huge letters "wice". "wice, Katowice, Hotel Katowice... this way." - I said, leading us to a street I didn't know. The bus stop was near the Hotel Katowice - that I was sure. So I just had to get there. Piece of cake. 

5 mins later we were at the bus stop. The bus was already there, it was 19:29. I looked on the buss, read my city name on it (not doing 2x same mistake), asked the driver if he goes to my city (better make sure xD), waved to the boy and took the last free sitting spot, next to a guy. The bus moved. Apparently I was right in time - a few secs late and I would have to wait 40 mins for next one. I was quite happy with the spot I got although it was on the back this time at least I was sitting - there was some people standing. 

Soon I wasn't so happy anymore. The passenger next to me ended up to be... sleepy. He fall asleep 5 times, 2 times he landed on my shoulder. He was so heavy. What the hell - all the guys decided to use me as a support today or what? I tried to ignore him for a while but then pushed him out of me. He wake up and said sorry. I smiled and laughed, it definitely was an aspie laugh. I could feel it. My self-control was on limits. But I guess the guy was to tired to give a damn. He fall asleep on my shoulder one more time (same result) and 3 times he almost fell from his chair to the other side when he fell asleep to the other side. I laughed at this too, not knowing how to react. I felt sorry for him. Fortunately he stopped it after a few mins and tried his best to stay awake. 

He asked me "Is it the hall/ball/wall already?" (I couldn't understand because I kinda turned off my hearing sense). "Umm... what?", "Is it the hall/ball/wall already?" - he repeated?, "I don't know" - I answered and looked through the window, wondering what he might be asking me for. I realized I am in a city I know - I used to work there, we were near the stop I was usually getting 2 years ago and I figured he must be asking about a bus stop. "There will be a small bus stop soon and after that there will be the Jaworzno Center one" - I said. "There is a cemetery near here, right?". Cemetery? My memory moved. I quess there was a cemetery near here. Yeah, definitely, I could even see it through the windows of my old workplace. "Yes, it is right here" - I answered, pointing my finger at the window and the cemetery wall apeared right in front of us. "Thank you." - he said. Then he left on the Jaworzno Center stop and I realised a huge building - apparently a sports hall. So thats what he asked for! Well. I never paid attention to the building so I couldn't know. 

Then I got to my city, called my mom to give me a car ride home, get in my room and got to my evening routine. But then something hit me - headache got back! Worse then before! And I couldnt get rid of it for 3 next days and nights. Im not going to any big city cinema anymore. Never ever. It apparently makes me sick...